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When I arrived in Exeter, I had your typical new student worries. How do I make friends again? Would I find my place? What should I do outside my studies? I told myself that the next few years would be a chance to grow, but I was confused how I could start that growth in the first place. What ultimately transformed the route I have taken across university and the career I want to persue wasn’t a dramatic moment or a sudden revelation – it was the simple decision to join a society.
I came to Exeter from rural Bedfordshire, with nobody back home at university, a gap year full of experiences and a confident personality. Reality hit when I came to university… I’ve got to make friends again and I’ve got to also pursue things outside of my subject. The day I arrived; I found myself in a position where the people around me already knew the whole of Exeter. They had people from home or who they went to school with… I felt like a misfit very quickly and didn’t know how to position myself.
I’ve always kept myself busy with my hobbies. I enjoyed playing and watching tennis, listening to music, and writing, but I still didn’t know how to explore these elements at university. I joined the University newspaper, Exeposé, after being handed a paper. It made me really start to love journalism and the impact writing can have on other people, but it was all virtual, so I didn’t meet anybody through the society at the start.
A few weeks went by and I had made friends, but lots of it had felt forced to me, not natural. It was during this time that I decided to join Tennis, as after all this was my favourite sport to watch and play. I decided to take the plunge and go to my first social event with the society. I walked in not knowing anyone, I wasn’t sure what to expect and kept overthinking everything. The moment I stepped through the door, those feelings eased. Committee members greeted me, I met a variety of people from first to third year, and everyone was very welcoming. That first social made all the difference between feeling lost at university and feeling a sense of belonging. I had finally found a group of people that shared a common interest with me, and people that I could share a laugh.
Across that first year, I joined a community of people to return to each week, giving me a sense of belonging I didn’t realise I needed. It made Exeter feel less like a place I lived in and more like a place where I was truly part of something.
What surprised me most was how much my confidence grew simply by taking part. I wasn’t consciously trying to improve myself - I was just enjoying being involved. Yet week by week, I found I met more and more people, quickly meeting some of my best friends at university to this day. By the start of the next academic year, I became Social Sec. Within a year, I had gone from being apprehensive of even going, to organising the socials.
Within this time frame, my confidence had boosted my writing and ability to put myself out there at Exeposé. I had built up a portfolio and became an editor at the paper. Joining these societies had taught me something new about what I was capable of. The process of saying “yes” - even when I felt slightly unsure - slowly chipped away at the self-doubt I’d carried with me at the start of university.
Eventually, I started third year, taking on bigger roles with these societies and becoming one of the chief editors of the paper. Whilst I still play tennis and have lots of friends on committee, I look back and remind myself how much joining a society has helped me grow.
Perhaps the most unexpected part was how far this new confidence reached. It shaped how I approached seminars, group projects and even daily interactions. I became more willing to voice my ideas, more comfortable taking initiative, and more secure in who I was becoming. More importantly, it helped me identify a career path that I love and enjoy. Sometimes it’s not about the destination but the journey and joining a society has encapsulated this saying.
Joining a society might seem like a small decision, but for me it changed everything. It gave me community, purpose, opportunities—and, ultimately, confidence I didn’t know I had. For any student at Exeter who’s still finding their feet, getting involved could be the first step toward the same transformation.
You can meet some societies and groups at the Society Welcome (Back) Fairs on Tuesday 13 Jan, Wednesday 14 Jan and Thursday 15 Jan in the Forum.